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marți, 7 mai 2019

Aventurile unui bolnav la Sf. Pantelimon sau domnul Lăzărescu mort a doua oară

   Aventurile unui bolnav la spitalul Pantelimon se apropie mult de „Moartea domnului Lăzărescu” - iată dar despre ce este vorba ...
   După o operație ortopedică, tânărul bolnav de doar 81 de ani a fost dus într-un salon: mizer, înghesuit, cu aparatul de aer condiționat scos din priză, cu lenjerie de o curățenie îndoielnică și cel puțin un pat rupt! Dar, cel mai trist, cu personal neglijent și indolent de la primul medic și până la ultima infirmieră! 
   Vrea bolnavul ceva?
   Are o nevoie?
   Să vină familia!
   Trebuie ridicat?
   Trebuie hrănit?
   Trebuie întors?
   Trebuie spălat?
   SĂ VINĂ FAMILIA!
   Mă întreb ce fel de suflete au scârbele care iau salariul aici, la Pantelimon!
   Vi se pare prea dur?
   Stați așa că n-am terminat.
   Orice se întâmplă în spital, se întâmplă cu ajutorul familiei! Dacă un bolnav nu are „aparținători” (l-aș împușca pe cel care a inventat acest impersonal termen înlocuitor de mai umanul rude sau prieteni ori apropiați) pur și simplu este lăsat la voia întâmplării! Dacă un bolnav are nevoi speciale dar nu are pe nimeni, este lăsat la voia întâmplării, dacă un bolnav este imobilizat, este lăsat la voia întâmplării! Nu credeți? Ei bine, într-un salon cu cinci bolnavi, într-o după amiază s-a închis ușa. Și ce dacă, vă spuneți dumneavoastră, oameni sănătoși, cu două mâini și două picioare - ei bine, nu ați înțeles nimic din ce v-am spus dacă vă puneți această întrebare:
PÂNĂ A DOUA ZI DE DIMINEAȚĂ, NU A INTRAT NIMENI ÎN SALON, NICI MASA DE SEARĂ NU A FOST DATĂ!
DE CE?
PENTRU CĂ A FOST UȘA ÎNCHISĂ!
   Vi se pare absurd?
   Vă asigur că nu este, este purul adevăr al spitalelor românești, spitale în care o infirmieră analfabetă are un salariu de specialist IT!
   Dar că o bătrână adusă de la un azil a zăcut câteva zile până să fie băgată în seamă, credeți? 
   Dar că atunci când au pus-o pe masă au constatat că nu toate analizele erau chiar bune?
   Dar că bârfa spitalului spune că „baba” surdo mută a murit, credeți? Cert este că n-a mai văzut-o nimeni! 
   Nu sfătuiesc pe nimeni să aibă nevoie de ceva în acest spital, pentru că nu va obține niciodată nimic! A, ar putea obține câte ceva, dar cu mulți nervi și cu un scandal monstru! Nu vă impacientați, medicii și tot personalul sunt într-o stare atât de avansată de indolență, încât orice scandal, orice rușine, le dispare din memorie în intervale de ordinul minutelor!

   Și vine iată și minunata și mult așteptata zi de ieșire din spital!
   Ce poate merge rău?
   Totul: ești chemat cel târziu la ora nouă, dar ambulanța care trebuie să ducă pacientul imobilizat acasă este comandată pentru 11:00! 
   Aștepți, te plimbi ... în sfârșit, sunt numai două ore din viața ta, timp în care poți aștepta liniștit să afli ce studiază asistenta șefă plus o colegă pe un site de cumpărături on-line. Timpul trece și se face de prânz ... bolnavul este de dimineață schimbat, pansat de bine de rău, ȚI S-A EXPLICAT CUM SĂ-I FACI TU INJECȚII ACASĂ, dar ambulanța nu mai vine ... Ceri explicații asistentei, dar răspunsul vine fulgerător, dovadă că a mai fost folosit și exersat: „eu am anunțat, nu mai este treaba mea”! Te superi, începi să te agiți, bolnavul este flămând (a trecut ora mesei) și iritat! 
   Ce să faci?
   Medicul care a operat bolnavul, te întreabă ce ai pățit: îi spui, iar el ridică din umeri, nu este treaba lui, nu-l interesează și dispare atât de rapid, încât nu-l mai vezi cât timp mai pierzi pe acolo!
   Te superi rău și suni la 112!
   Acolo, cineva verifică și constată că da, s-a cerut mașină și ți se cere să ai răbdare: tu ai mai avea, bolnavul nu! Vrei să afli un timp estimativ al sosirii dar este imposibil. Închizi furios!
   Mai trec 10 sau 15 minute și suni din nou: să-l ia dracu de sistem și pe arafatul care-mi spune să nu ocup linia cu urgențe care nu sunt urgențe reale: pentru tine starea bolnavului de 81 de ani și nedeplasabil este o foarte mare urgență!
   Vorbești cu operatorul 35 care te roagă su nu țipi la dumneaei: înțelegi că luat de val faci morală cui nu trebuie și îți ceri scuze! Promite să verifice. După încă juma de ceas, vine ambulanța reprezentată de ... șofer! De șofer și atât! Pui mâna, tragi de targă, muți bolnavul, înjuri printre dinți, te doare spatele, plin de draci de duci din nou peste asistenta șefă atât de iritat încât până și ea se teme să te refuze și trimite UN (1) brancardier să te ajute! UNUL!
   Îi spui în gând ministrului sănătății toate ce-ți trec prin cap și-i dorești să-i stea în gât toate exercițiile de imagine cu vizitele „inopinante” de prin spitale și-i urezi să aibă soarta lui piedone, cel de la care a învățat să-și facă în ochii proștilor campanie electorală gratuită!
   Cu chiu cu vai, ajungi la mașină.
   Iar cu chiu cu vai, ajungi acasă. 
   Bolnavul nu poate fi mutat în doi sau trei oameni: șoferul, om cu experiență, sună la pompieri și le cere ajutorul!
   Sistemul, inteligent ca cei care ne conduc, reacționează și trimite la fața locului 
O AUTOSPECIALĂ, PLINĂ CU APĂ, MAȘINĂ AFLATĂ PROBABIL 
ÎN DRUM SPRE VREO INTERVENȚIE CU FOC!
   Pompierii, în sfârșit, pun mâna și cu multă grijă și neașteptată delicatețe transportă bătrâna bolnavă în casă: vrei să-i omenești, să le dai 
de-o bere, de-un mic, o atenție, ceva: plini de mândria ocupației lor, pompierii răspund că sunt plătiți pentru ceea ce fac, refuză să ia ceva și pleacă urându-ți sănătate!
   Cazi frânt: nu-ți vine să crezi că s-a terminat!

   Ω

   Singurii OAMENI cu care ai avut de-a face au fost pompierii, oameni care-și riscă viața și sănătatea pe niște salarii de kko!
   VREȚI SĂ ȘTIȚI DACĂ PERSONALUL MEDICAL PLĂTIT 
DUMNEZEIEȘTE MAI CERE ȘI MAI IA ȘPAGĂ?
   DA: ȘI MAI CERE ȘI MAI IA!
   SĂ NU UIT: ÎNTR-UN SPITAL ROMÂNESC, NIMENI NU ARE NICI O RESPONSABILITATE! 
   NIMENI!
   Doar bolnavul este vinovat că este bolnav ...

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